Marchen

This one is fully written and I’m including the guitar chords. I’m working slowly on an actual recording of it but am running into some difficulties. While I am able to write okay with a guitar I really struggle to play effectively (only three fingers — including my thumb — on my fret hand work correctly, and a compound fracture shattered the bones in my left wrist). That said, here you go.

B add11/F#
A/E
G6/D
E/B
AMaj sus 7 (omit 5th)
E/B
D Sus 4
E Sus 4
E/B
AMaj sus 7 (omit 5th)
E/B
B add11/F#

Make believe in fairytales
games of charades
lies, sighs, and fables
on a friendship drive
a personality crusade to surpass

You tend to depress
from one face to another
all looks whole but one is apart
sitting small
and frightened the real you
sitting small
and frightened the real dreamer

Accepting life under glass eyes
telling yourself
that it keeps you safe
but you know, the spies are watching you
but you know
it ain’t for your protection

You tend to fold for
his paranoia
all looks whole but one is apart
sitting small
and frightened the real you
sitting small
and frightened the real dreamer

Make believe in fairytales
games of charades
lies, spies, and fables
under watchful eyes
a personality hidden away

You tend to lie
as you hide who you are
all looks whole but one is apart
sitting small
and frightened the real you
sitting small
and frightened the real dreamer

Make believe in fairytales
games of despair
subsuming yourself
on a mirror drive
to convince that you are real
on a mirror drive to hide
the real dreamer

Won’t you stand tall
And steadfast the real you
Won’t you stand tall
And steadfast the true belonger
Won’t you stand tall
After all these years
Won’t you stand tall
And steadfast
The true belonger

Hiphop 0.3

This is what it feels like to feel alone
locked into my house no longer feels like my home
this is what it feels like to feel nothing
staring at the walls straining for something
holding tight just trying to keep from crying and cutting

Self-injury a way to somehow feel something
or to stop all of the pain and alleviate the suffering
when people die it isn’t them that feels the pain
the left behind are the ones who feel the shame

This is what it looks like in the mirror when I see me
locked inside my head where nobody can hear me
ain’t really smiled in months not since the time you last saw me
I guess I have to understand that you must really hate me

I cannot stop believing that you wish that I was dead
it happens when I’m struggling with the demons in my head
happens often at night when I’m in that lonely bed
wonder what I’d look like lying drowned in the riverbed

Self-injury a way to somehow feel something
or to stop all of the pain and alleviate the suffering
when people die it isn’t them that feels the pain
the left behind are the ones who feel the shame

If I believed in any gods I’d be on my knees and praying
but there’s nobody listening to a single word I’m saying
the walls are closing in my eyes blank from your betraying
nobody to hear the music and words of my emotions fraying

I been reaching and searching for something I cannot find
trapped inside the horror of the loss and in my own mind
making beats nobody ever hears with my own rhyme
each one sealed and delivered and with my grief self-signed

Self-injury a way to somehow feel something
or to stop all of the pain and alleviate the suffering
when people die it isn’t them that feels the pain
the left behind are the ones who feel the shame

Peace

Cataclysm

The fires are burning
as I stumble across the earth
mere compensation
for times we left behind
Gabriel falling
to live with mortal men
trumpet is silent
the empire can’t defend

Nephilim rising
to take back what was theirs
hate for the living
for what they have become
Prometheus wishing
that he’d never given them
fire and knowledge
with which they could define

Time is standing still in this empty void
Lightspeed near and forever to be destroyed
Stars are burning out in this hollow place
Destruction of the fabric of all of time and space

The angels are not coming
just oblivion’s call
no gods left to answer prayers
wings crumbled all to dust
Demons walk in human guise
false empathy their cry
for courage lacked by humankind
will rain down eradication

Time is standing still in this empty void
Lightspeed near and forever to be destroyed
Stars are burning out in this hollow place
Destruction of the fabric of all of time and space

The fires are burning
as I stumble across the earth
and the embers blaze in my eyes
like times we left behind
Heaven has fallen
and the silver city gone
voices are silent
the empire can’t defend

Time is standing still in this empty void
Lightspeed near and forever to be destroyed
Stars are burning out in this hollow place
Destruction of the fabric of all of time and space

Wealth

Psychopaths and CEOs
priests and politicians
liars wars for profit cause
this is the situation
people dying in the street
freezing in winter’s cold
they could all be easy saved
if we gave a fuck

I’m calling down the red flag song
eight billion of us losing but not for long
we’re setting up the guillotines
we’re coming for revenge
we’re sick to fuck of you telling us our ends

Sociopathic businessman
with fancy clothes and house
stripping people of their cash
and taking food from mouths
he ain’t ever cared
if you had enough to eat
he ain’t never worried
about where you might sleep

I’m calling down the red flag song
eight billion of us losing but not for long
we’re setting up the guillotines
we’re coming for revenge
we’re sick to fuck of you telling us our ends

Fractured (lyric)

You will return now
To the life that you lived
Passionless greyness
That has nothing to give
It’s safe but it’s boring
And it eats at your soul
Just going through motions
As you sink in the hole

You can change your location
You can change where you rest
But the emptiness grows still
Until nothing is left
Change your name or your hairstyle
And pretend that you’re fine
Behind the mask of a sad smile
That doesn’t show in your eyes

You’re fractured
But you’ll still say you’re fine
Swallowing the pain that holds you tight
You’re fractured
But you’ll lie to yourself
The ache that sits heavily inside

You’ll smile at all the right places
Let out a cold shallow laugh
But the anguish will eat you
Can’t sort the wheat from the chaff
As the years take your beauty
And the lines cross your face
The despondency growing
Feeling more out of place

You used to tell me
of the dullness inside
but you’re cloaking your feelings
desperate just to hide
Your sadness will rise like
the bitter taste of defeat
but you’ll stay in that lost life
all your days on repeat

You’re fractured
But you’ll still say you’re fine
Swallowing the pain that holds you tight
You’re fractured
But you’ll lie to yourself
The ache that sits heavily inside

Your existence is empty
As you often said
In those moments spent with me
Lying there in that bed
And you don’t know where you’re going
You can’t escape from the numb
It’s continuing dreary
And you have nowhere to run

Your world will grow colder
With each passing day
As you wonder what happened
But you have nothing to say
So you’ll live in the silence
Of a life that turned sour
Regretting all of the years gone
Unease haunting each hour

You’re fractured
But you’ll still say you’re fine
Swallowing the pain that holds you tight
You’re fractured
But you’ll lie to yourself
The ache that sits heavily inside

You’re fractured
But you’ll still say you’re fine
Swallowing the pain that holds you tight
You’re fractured
But you’ll lie to yourself
The ache that sits heavily inside


Babylon (song)

You could have saved me, if only you cared
You could have cut through this grief
If you had once but shared
But you’d rather I suffer
In this Babylon pain
And you would I rather
Suffer this shame
I’ll ride on this river of Babylon shame
I’ll ride in the street of this Babylon blame
I’ll ride on the ridges of Babylon high
I’ll fall in the depths as Babylon dies
You could have come while I was lost in this fall
You could have come, mitigated it all
You could have come made it all alright
You could have come, put sun in the light
I’ll ride on this river of Babylon shame
I’ll ride in the street of this Babylon blame
I’ll ride on the ridges of Babylon high
I’ll fall in the depths as Babylon dies
No one ever answers the phone for me
No one ever answers the call from me
No one ever whispers the words I need to hear
Nobody calms this cold dead fear
I’ll ride on this river of Babylon shame
I’ll ride in the street of this Babylon blame
I’ll ride on the ridges of Babylon high
I’ll fall in the depths as Babylon dies

Fragment 0.8

I have picked out a lullaby, to sing to you
in words you won’t understand — and I will not translate
them to English or French or any other tongue
let them move you in their own way
their beauty bring calm and peace
even as my voice shakes as I sing
and if my voice breaks at times, be assured
in grace and in compassion
that this is not the breaking of sorrow
but my wistful plea to the awe of the lyric
and if I fail to find, on occasion, the key
do not call foul or fair
for I am but a poor bard, of talents few
but these I shall give, in humble supplication
as I sing to you this lullaby
this song of evening and of dusk
this berceuse of melody and whispered word
this prayer

Song 0.5

Waking each day, each in in its own way
a darkness that never ends
you stare at the light, and it seems far too bright
illuminates what you couldn’t defend
desperate times call for desperate means
raise a glass to your spirits and ghosts
your living has left you split at the seams
as you stand up to offer the toast

You pace through the halls, and stare at the walls
remember her hand on the knife
barely able to walk, you’re reduced to a crawl
and the memories of a wasted life
it all seems to stop, as you count the cost
on your fingers and in your head
nothing was gained, everything lost
there are only the tears that you shed

There is nothing left inside with meaning, hope, or joy
set down, discarded, like a child’s unwanted toy
left tied and chained as an anonymous whipping boy
this is the future
this is your fate
no more the suitor
penitent for her to excommunicate

Waiting each dawn, before the night’s gone
for all dreams to enduringly cease
the sun hits the lawn, and daybreak is drawn
on a face that can never see peace
mouth open wide as you scream to the sky
a silent refrain from your bed
and in your futile voice, you think of the choice
and the very last words that she said

This is the future
this is your fate
no more the suitor
penitent for her to excommunicate

Note: I rather like this although it needs some polishing. I have the keyboard party mostly written. I am hugely indebted to the lyricism of Roger Waters in this piece — a conscious acknowledgement of his influence on me as a writer

Song 0.4

Born beneath the steeple and raised up in the shack
Played out on the street on the dusty tarmac
In winter the old chimney would mutter and crack
Our faces smeared with soot like a panic attack

The people in the church would bold and loudly pray
Sneer at us across the street and in the alleyway
Grew into a man despite the jeers and the dismay
Found work as a carpenter and so I plied my trade

And the river is rising
The wind reeks of blood
The hanging tree bows
As you’re dragged through the mud
Cut sideways and upwards
Through flower and bud
But the wounds that cut most
Are those fashioned from love

Made good and met a pretty girl – built a house and fenced the yard
Found and then lost on the turn of a card
Life was never easy, oh lord but it was hard
The hatred of the townsfolk left us always on our guard

My wife was so pretty and so kind and so sweet
The whisperers said she should do better than me
Fingers point in our direction in the stores and on the street
Thinking they were more than us in all of their conceit

And the river is rising
The wind reeks of blood
The hanging tree bows
As you’re dragged through the mud
Cut sideways and upwards
Through flower and bud
But the wounds that cut most
Are those fashioned from love

They came for us one evening in the sleet and the snow
Screamed we didn’t quite fit in and their screaming turned to blows
Then they lit the fires and our house was aglow
And they took down my pretty wife and left her for the crows

Many hours later I came back around
Heard the fire still crackling such an awful sound
Wept at what had happened but now I’m honour bound
To seek revenge on all in this terrible town

And the river is rising
The wind reeks of blood
The hanging tree bows
As you’re dragged through the mud
Cut sideways and upwards
Through flower and bud
But the wounds that cut most
Are those fashioned from love

I’m seeking my revenge so bitter and strong
Nothing but this hate to keep my heart strong
Stand up the threat of the menacing throng
Ain’t nothing but a spectator to my own song

I love her now as I loved her then
Ain’t nothing left inside in this sorrowed glen
I’ll let you die running, count to ten
Basted in angels blood, bands of men

And the river is rising
The wind reeks of blood
The hanging tree bows
As you’re dragged through the mud
Cut sideways and upwards
Through flower and bud
But the wounds that cut most
Are those fashioned from love

Song 0.3

I’m drowning in the rain
Your weather takes its toll
There are people out there who are not me
And they’re bringing back reality
And this coat I’m hiding in
Has room for both of us inside
So don’t stand there in the storm
Nobody wants to be a broken soul

And I’m drowning
And I’m trying not to get you wet
And I’m inundated, suffocated, consecrated
By the sound of your tears
By the touch of your hand
By the grief of the only heart I can ever kiss
And the words of love from your lips

I’m swimming through the storm
I’m sinking like a stone
I feel the eyes of the world ignoring me
They don’t care if I stay or go
And the captain lied about this ship
But the lifeboats are still here
So hold my hand if we’re overwhelmed
Let me take all of your fear

And I’m drowning
And I’m trying not to get you wet
And I’m inundated, suffocated, consecrated
By the sound of your tears
By the touch of your hand
By the grief of the only heart I can ever kiss
And the words of love from your lips